Dude. Unlimited Dodger Dogs? I love that team so much.

Also, I’m doing the Totally JK show at Rififi this Monday. Be there at 8 pm and see me, Sean O’Connor, Nick Kroll, Demitri Martin and your hosts Joe Mande and Noah Garfinkel!

More video fun!

Did I ever blog this before? I snuck some stand-up onto my Myspace. Why? No idea. But here it is:

P.S.: Be my friend.

From “Sister Bernadette’s Barking Dog: The quirky history and lost art of diagramming sentences:”

And this despite the intriguing fact that grammar is an outgrowth of the word glamour: they are, in fact, the same word, through the magic of something called “dissimilation,” in which glamour becomes grammar in much the same way peregrine becomes pilgrim. Whichever way you spell it, the word was originally about magic and witchcraft. Grammar meant learning, which a few centuries ago was understood to involve magic, or at least astrology. And even today, a glamorous person casts a spell.

Yeah, it’s nerdy. What of it?

Folks, tomorrow night I’m very suddenly doing a show at the PIT.

Be there if you can! I’m going to get to screw around with a microphone for longer than usual for the first time in NYC.

EDIT: Yeah, so it turns out that this isn’t happening. So like if anyone wants to hang out…

Here it is.

But really, here it is:

Looking for the jokes

Damn, but I can make an exit. Here we go, folks.

I got on a plane for New York City — leaving Boulder for the last time — just before 1 o’clock this morning. While most of last week was filled with various rugs being yanked out from under me, getting on that plane was a huge relief, because I ended up exhausted on a redeye flight sitting next to the loud drunk guy with the loud ringtone.

I’d seen him in the airport and figured right away that being his airborne neighbor would be the only way the world would let me out of this. Chief Niwot, fate, the comedy gods. I don’t know. But I was meant to leave Boulder crunched next to a mix of the Verizon “can you hear me now?” guy and Will Ferrell’s character from “Old School.”

As a huge fan of comedy and sometimes a student, I can recognize a punch line a mile away. Sometimes it’s tough to find the joke, though. Help.

Punch line: As a guy who spent most of his 2½ years in Colorado resenting the populations outside of Denver and Boulder primarily for their voting habits, the best time I had all week was a night at Oskar Blues up in Lyons. I knew it was going to be a good night when the woman singing ended a song as we entered and yelled out, “Hey, (Drinkin’ Boots), where’s your robot suit?” Read the rest of this entry »

I’m such a blog bastard.

OK, here’s the deal. I’ve been in the throes of moving again this week, there’s stuff all over the apartment, a friend of mine is coming over to meet me here so we can walk to the subway and I’m brainstorming reasons why she can’t come in that aren’t as obvious as “my place is a craphole right now.”

Meanwhile, I thought it’d be appropriate to mention here that I’m headed to RiFiFi tonight to do thirty seconds of stand-up at Invite Them Up.

So that’s weird/cool.

And you Boulderites should look out for my very last column in the newly renamed and redesigned Camera tomorrow. It’s a weird one. I mean they all have been lately. But this one’s weird because it’s final.

OK, he’s two for two. He makes me laugh. Plus it turns out he did a lot of stuff. If you haven’t seen it, be sure to also check out the ad he ran during his last gubernatorial campaign.

Hey, here’s something I didn’t know:

Q. I want to follow your recommendation and buy compact fluorescent lightbulbs, but I’ve discovered they contain mercury. What should I do?

A. Buy them anyway — the small amount of mercury (less than in a watch battery) can be handled by a hazardous-waste facility.

I’d just been getting nervous about the mercury thing after more and more people pointed it out. Less than in a watch battery? OK, now we’re getting somewhere. Just don’t forget to follow steps outlined on this PDF of how to handle your compact fluorescents.