I love Gothamist. I’m thinking about writing a love song about it. I have written them love letters/pitches and they go off into the webmobile, never answered*. I sit at home and sigh, my hair in curlers, waiting by the phone, doodling my name in the margins of Newsweek and the Economist and Esquire after taking their girly quizzes: “David Winston Gothamist,” I’d write.

But I digress. Today they’ve gone and found a hipster-targeted mutual fund. It is the GendeX Thrasher Fund.

GendeX.

Just me, or does GendeX sound like something that could get you out of the army?

*More to come on this topic, which is now not true. My unrequited love is now a little more requited.

Ukulele sensation Ballard C. Boyd is the recipient of most of the weird links I find while perusing the digital webscape. Typically his response is, “what the hell were you searching for?”

Fair question, sir. So now I will attempt to make public this information.

While searching the interfjords for “silly elephant pictures,” I found my new favorite product line:

Chewish treats: Yiddish-themed dog toys ranging from Meshugeneh the Monkey to Tuchis the Donkey to Schlep the Camel. Tuchis the Donkey is the funniest to me because it’s not just an appropriate Yiddish name but a pun, to boot.

I did not find any good silly elephant pictures, though.

P.S.: My roommate’s purchase of egg nog-flavored ice cream today kicks of the season of anticipation of the newest Ballard C. Boyd Christmas Album. If you’ve never heard a ukulele sensation Ballard C. Boyd Christmas Album, pester him at his blog about it.

Ron freakin’ Paul. He won a Republican straw poll.

Big deal, right? Straw poll. Doesn’t matter. Straws don’t even vote. And it doesn’t count for anything… but shame! Because he won it in New York City. Let’s see, what’s significant about New York City related to the 2008 presidential elections?

Oh, Hillary Clinton! She’s running. And she’s a senator from New York. But, hang on — Wikipedia says she’s a Democrat. Curious as that may be, I guess she’s not what makes Paul’s victory so interesting. Hm, hm, hm.

How foolish of me. I forgot that Rudolph Giuliani, former mayor of New York City, is also running for president! While he was out with John McCain shopping for hard-core Christian right voters, Ron Paul swept in and beat Rudy in his own backyard. With some big religious right names throwing their weight behind candidates for their electability, it’s interesting to note that in New York City, Hillary could beat Rudy, Bloomberg could probably beat Rudy and… Ron Paul just beat Rudy.

Not that the right is particularly concerned with winning New York. Just sayin’.

How did he do it? Was it the Internerd? If so, has he learned from history and can he avoid falling into the same traps as Howard Dean? Well, according to the Internet message forums around the world, the main thing about Ron Paul is he is infallible and will stop taxes from being necessary because, if elected, he will eliminate the IRS, which is totally a big-ass money pit.